so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed