i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
