There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize