I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
My breasts were aching with rage.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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