We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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