like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize