Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member