Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n