well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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