well you can't waste a boner
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.