To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Randomize
