Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.

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(413): I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing. http://tfl.nu/g19l

Replies (21) Good night (1465) Bad night (3834)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.

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(704): IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT. http://tfl.nu/nkol

Replies (18) Good night (944) Bad night (4893)
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(214): View more from Texas

You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song

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(214): You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song http://tfl.nu/2x4f

Replies (25) Good night (9756) Bad night (873)
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(352): View more from Florida

if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.

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(352): if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong. http://tfl.nu/rar8

Replies (20) Good night (3811) Bad night (735)
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(650): View more from California

This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"

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(650): This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case" http://tfl.nu/fgo6

Replies (12) Good night (6511) Bad night (815)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?

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(931): is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl? http://tfl.nu/m6rn

Replies (20) Good night (1202) Bad night (6071)
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(510): View more from California

I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.

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(510): I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots. http://tfl.nu/tjxa

Replies (1) Good night (832) Bad night (2701)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.

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(252): I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them. http://tfl.nu/kwke

Replies (12) Good night (5148) Bad night (748)
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(989): View more from Michigan

He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame

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(989): He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame http://tfl.nu/n7tj

Replies (6) Good night (5291) Bad night (1091)
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(813): View more from Florida

It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"

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(813): It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman" http://tfl.nu/5ocz

Replies (9) Good night (1742) Bad night (795)
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(573): View more from Missouri

welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list

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(573): welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list http://tfl.nu/7gq6

Replies (4) Good night (1204) Bad night (635)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.

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(816): Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand. http://tfl.nu/c0ji

Replies (14) Good night (684) Bad night (2050)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.

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(402): Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop. http://tfl.nu/dwia

Replies (2) Good night (424) Bad night (188)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.

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(307): I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire. http://tfl.nu/z5bx

Replies (0) Good night (512) Bad night (202)
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(406): View more from Montana

That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!

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(406): That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face! http://tfl.nu/7j4j

Replies (2) Good night (203) Bad night (393)

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