What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you will always have a special place in my vag
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
