You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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