oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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