it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
