I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize