You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
