Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Is Oprah even human
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
