Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
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you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
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i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face