And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left