When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed