it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.