closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
