Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.