tell your sister to shave her snatch
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
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