youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize