She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.