He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
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Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
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The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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