Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
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okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.