I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.