You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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