If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
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Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
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I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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