she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize