mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize