Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
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She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
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he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.