Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.