Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
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I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
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Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.