Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
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he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
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You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
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