why didn't you poke me back
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
