i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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