Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Oh god it's open bar.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
