just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
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