Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
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I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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