the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize