I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
