I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
