We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
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Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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