Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?