If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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