What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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