I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
